Feelings flow beneath my ken.
Today I attended a funeral for a child on the cusp of being a young man who suffered far too much and whose life ended far too soon. I did not know him well, but his eulogy sketched out the portrait of a sensitive, creative, loving soul. I do, however, know his mother and father and know that their grief has been overwhelming, as well as that of the boy’s older brother. There were several times during the service today where I was aware of the fact that I normally would feel deeply about a particular stimulus. It was not that the awareness of sorrow was not there, but the accompanying welling of emotion and tears were not present. That was the genesis of this haiku. Such is the trade-off sometimes of taking antidepressants. Just now I am grateful for their sway in my life, even given this somewhat numbing effect. There may come a day when I may need to dial them back a bit, but perhaps being aware of the way they in which they work and knowing cognitively that I am empathetic and sorrowful is enough for just now.